Worst Customer Service In Uganda

So that’ll be one Fuck You with a side of Kiss My Ass. Anything to drink, sir?

 

• Hello, I’d like to order lunch.
• People only call this number to either ask me out or to order something and since I don’t date people who eat stuff from takeaways then ordering lunch is your only option. So, you want what?
• Well, what do you have on the menu?
• Have you ever been to Kampala?
• I am calling from Industrial area.
• Then we have what Kampala takeaways have in Kampala. Chips chaps, chicken warrever. Pick one or more.
• Um… do you have salads?
• Salads for what?
• For healthy eating.
• If you want healthy eating why are you calling a takeaway?
• Madam, I have to point out something.
• Is it your order? Because you have been on my phone for a while and you still haven’t made an order yet.
• I have to point out that I find you quite rude.
• That is because I am actually being very rude to you. Now order quickly, my soap is about to start. And don’t think I come here to serve customers. I come here to watch TV so my priorities are already set.
• How do you talk to customers like that?
• Look, let me make it easy for you. Eat chips, sausage and chaps. FARIDA! Make chips sausage and chap take away….what?…. Oh. Sorry, Farida is a muslim, she won’t touch any pork, so it will be a beef sausage.
• I don’t want that order. I want to talk to your manager in fact.
• Ssebo…
• Yes?
• Caller…
• Yes?
• Genius…
• What?
• You think I would talk to you like this if my supervisor was here? Now, I’m giving the phone to Kyenswa who will get directions to where he is to deliver your shit. If you think talking to a rude waitress is bad, you don’t know what you are in for. Talking to a stupid bodaboda is going to make you think of me as a fond memory. Now, Beautiful But Unlucky is on. Bye.