Wolverine is here. Premier tonight courtesy of Coca-Cola Uganda, and I’m going. See FOMO. Now, Presenting, a few things we expect from this film.
- It to be as awesome as X-Men Origins: Wolverine which was fine enough to watch three times, one of those being the pirated copy where they had not even finished applying the computer generated imagery and we could real see the buwuzi he swings on.
- Hugh Jackman to not have the best performance in the film, because this summer, the best performances are coming from the bad guys. From Fast& Furious 6, to Star Trek, to Man of Steel… hell, even Identity Theft. The only film where the bad guy wasn’t the best thing in the film I can think of is White House Down, where John McClaine V2.o won. Hell, even Mandarin owned Iron Man 3.
- A lot of kicking and slicing and three dimensions of it because that is how technology works. It increases the immersiveness of the snikt.
- A lot of people to not know what “Ma harblz” means.
- Cameos. Somebody has to show up unexpectedly in this movie. I can’t even guess who it’s going to be, but I am eager to see some other X-Man just appear. No, not that one. An unexpected one.
- No actual wolverines. An actual wolverine is a small American rat, not an Australian actor.
- Someone to talk through the movie not knowing that this might actually be the one time I snap and throw a shoe. I’m a ticking time bomb in that regard. Any day might be the day.