I shall briefly take a moment to address the haters, who are corny with that illuminati mess.
Some alleged that I am bragging when I mention that I have a car.
Silly dumblebums. Ludicrous arthropods.
Have you ever seen Kampala? Have you seen Kampala in the evening?
Of a rainy day?
It is like Beyonce’s new single. As in that jam is tight!
So many people in Kampala have cars that it us no special thing to be one of them. I might as well brag about my gorillos.
I have six pairs of Chuck Taylors by the way.
My special lady friend is yet to take me out for seafood, though. Which suggests that there may be room for improvement in my various lovemaking techniques so even though I slay with my chuckies, I cannot brag that much because instead if taking me to red lobsters she sends me out to get rolex from the trading centre.
I told her to stop speaking rukiga in bed. I cant control what happens.
Back to the topic.
So many people in kla have cars that it us nothing to brag about. In fact if you make the poor life decision of driving through Kira Road at night… or Jinja Road… or Entebbe Road… or really any flat surface wider than six feet you will soon realise that most of the car owners in this city are worthless pieces if shit who barely have the right to brag about having functioning brains that understand physics, morals and logic let alone having functioning cars.
A car is not a pair of Loiubutoon stilettos, something you suffer with so you can imagine that people in Chuck Taylors are praising you as you acheyfoot your way up and down the potholed pavements.
It is a tool. It is supposed to make your life more convenient.
One brags about achievement. Clever things one has done. Like not having been in a single traffic jam all year long. It’s not easy. It takes shrewd planning and cunning management of time, but I did it. I rock.
I just flow past all you bitches in your Klugers as I gansta lean on a TVS. The ac on the bike is even better.
So in conclusion let me talk about having a car.
I have one. A black Spacio. Good fuel consumption from Shell. Fuel save.
The radio dies not work but I have a Bluetooth speaker so it is Outkast, Jennifer Hudson, Sheebah, Kenzo all the way.
Leero I parked it at a washing bay and took a bike to work.
I got out of the bay and hired three bodas. One in front to go hooting to the beat of Formation, one for me to ride with sunglasses on and one to follow behind carrying my mifi.
So I get to work with a convoy. My boda game is nice like that.
All by bodas now lets get in formation.