Music Of Them Days Was Deep. Music Of These Days Is Shallow. Mbu.

Dear young People who are fans of Wiz Khalifa, Nikki Minaj, Drizzy and that other annoying one, how sick and tired are you of smug, haughty old fogies sneering at your music with that irritating snort of theirs and dismissing it as shallow, superficial, mindless, “bubblegum”? Up to where have you had it with them claiming that the music of their own days was full of substance and artsiness and meat and real talent unlike yours?

Well, allow me to snitch on my peoples from the late eighties and early nineties.

I will do this by providing you with a breakdown of some of the most stupid, braindead, thick, hollowbollock, dumbasatonneofdumbness, pathologically idiotic songs that were in no short supply during the eighties.

Seriously, your brain lost mass and volume every time this song played.

And yet they would go to night clubs. They would pay money to hear this song. They would travel from the suburbs at a time when there were no bodabodas and way way fewer cars – some would walk—to places which were full of people as desperate for earfuls of this tripe and squeeze into packed rooms which were so hot and humid due to the fact that the era of airconditioning had not yet been ushered in by the NRM and clubs still used fans believe it or not and it would be so stuffy and hot in there that the walls, the walls themselves,would be wet with condensed sweat. Eugh!

And people would go through all this just to hear This song.

These are the lyrics

Pump up the jam

Pump it up

While your feet are stomping

And the jam is pumping

Look ahead the crowd is jumpin’

Pump it up a little more

Get the party goin’ on the dance floor

See ’cause that’s where the party’s at

And you’ll find out if you do that

 

I want a place to say:

“Get your booty on the floor tonight!”

Make my day

I want a place to say:

“Get your booty on the floor tonight!”

Make my day

Make my day

 Make my day

 Make my day

 Make my day