Luluuuuuu… What Happened After




Lulu : Just a minute. (glug, glug.) Who is it? (glug glug).


Mum: Did you mobile money me a quarter of the rent, Lulu? Is that where you get the right to lock doors in my house?


Lulu: Is the door locked? I have no idea how that happened. I didn’t even know it could close. Mummy, we have to have a word with the architect.  (Glug, glug).


Mum : You had better have a boy in there cos if I find that you have been drinking my soda you will wish things.


Lulu : (Glug, burp)  Just  a minute…


Mum: You think this door will protect you from my sapatu?  The sapatu is mighty. It laughs at your puny doors. Now open in two seconds.


Lulu: It wasn’t me. You have no habeas corpus. It could have been daddy.


Mum: Daddy doesn’t drink anything but Johnnie Black. Times up. Open the door or I’ll huff and I’ll puff…


Lulu finally opens door.


Mum: Breath check.


Lulu: I don’t think that’s a good idea. I have a cough. Might be ebola.


Mum: Lulu, where is my soda?


Lulu : Um… Beg your pardon?


Mum : Don’t look at me like a UPE student, you know exactly what I mean.


Lulu : Oh, that soda. Of yours. Um…  Yeah. I ronno.


Mum: Well  do you know where your scrawny little thieving butt is?  Cos this kiboko is just about to find out…


The rest is history.