How To Be Nominated: Aka you can run, but ..

  At last, after Sevo, Amama and Besigye were nominated, we saw Kakya, Bwanika, Mabiriizi, Baryamureeba and Sseya, the curtain-raisers for the elections of next year, get their stamps. This is a factual, accurate, absolutely honest and scientifically reliable and completely and utterly true transcript of what happened when each of them went into the […]

The Main Ugandans: Who Or What Is Kizza Besigye.

There are thirty eight million two hundred and twenty nine thousand forty five Ugandans in viable existance at the moment. Although, if you want to be explicitly Ugandan, that will be eight million, two h undred and twenty nine thouthands forty five.   With such a large number of lumpen scabs running around, how do […]

Radio and Weasel featuring Traffic Jams.

      This is how the events of that fateful evening transpired consequent to the situation under observation duly concerning the people in   First, let’s set the stage. The scene is Entebbe Road. As usual, traffic jam. Both ways. To and fro. Jammin’ to is the self, Ernest F. Bazanye, blogger, newspaper columnist, […]

How To Make A Ugandan Rolex

There is another google search result for this topic. This one had better not supersede that one. But we agreed that we are going to get our culture and lifestyles and our stories as Ugandans onto the internet, and I was told to do Rollas, so here we go. Ingredients: 1 Sexually attractive chicken. No, […]

Run This Town: How I Stopped Being Lazy

Last time we spoke about health and fitness we decided that it was time for me to stop being a constituent piece of the sofa set and get some exercise into my life.   To this end I got a pair of running shoes. Before I tell you about the shoes, I believe they deserve […]

Being The Bigger Man

I put on a lot of weight, quite rapidly, over the past two months. It was sudden and unexpected. One day I noticed that my jeans were a bit snug. The next week I just could not let myself out in them unless I wore a pair of stretchy briefs over the fly like Superman. […]

Chill Break: On Phone Nudes. Not Wearing The Social Fabric

  More nude photos. More heads on the chopping block. More hypocrisy and anger and smug recrimination. Ernest Bazanye points fingers at Ernest Bazanye   Q: I thought this was a newspaper. Are leaking nudes news? Every week another set of pictures falls into our inboxes. Celebrity nudes are as common as spam SMS calling […]