Before You Run Off To Eritrea: A Few Questions

Hi Uganda

I am Zeinat,  special attache of hotness from the Eritrean Embassy to Uganda. Warraps.

We have heard your response to the hoax news of a man shortage in our country leading to enforced bigamy.

So, it looks like all the thirst in Uganda is plotting to get on a bus and haul itself to our nation, eh?

Well, that is understandable. I mean…


After all…




So of course. But before you all go and fabricate the death of a relative so you can go around office collecting mabugo and take the money to the travel agent to book a one way ticket ehre, we need you to pause a bit.
To remember one thing.

We are hot.


Really hot.

You know that nobody noticed El Nino in Eritrea? Cos there was too much hotness even during the rain.

The standard situation with hot babes as you know is that you don’t just bring yourself and declare #Iamapass. So on behalf of the hot Eritreans, or the Hotreans if you like, we have compiled a little questionaire.

Don’t worry. We are not going to ask difficult questions about sex so you don’t have to chase the kids off the blog. Uganda has the fastest growing population in the region. We know you bone.

This is the issues other than.

1: Deodorant is

a) optional
b) For wimps
c) Expensive
d) Essential. Never leave home without it.

2. Which singing brown best represents you?

a) Chris
b) Bobby
c) James

3. Honey, do I look fat in this?

a) Totally. You look fat in everying. Because you are fat.
b) As in a) but add to that, “Come let us make fat love, you beautiful fat woman!”
c) Why are you asking me that? Is this a trick? Are you trying to break up with me? Is that what this is about? Generally flip the question around and make it another topic cos this isn’t my first rodeo.

4. Can I borrow your phone for a bit?

a) Sure. Passcode is our anniversary
b) Sure. Right after I set it on fire and then bathe the ashes in acid.
C)No. Get your own phone and download your own porn.

5. Sex?
a) Male
b) Ugandan
c) You think I came all this way for hwat?

6. If you are in the friend zone do you…
a) Stay put
b) Fight to the last breath never give up
c) Holler at my sister