Conversations with Airtel Anita, my airtime chick.
*Anita, nga you look dark today. Where is the usual makeup? Your complexion is usually more like the inside of the potato; today you look like the outside.
-Anko, me I don’t want to be hot any more. I am tired of attulacting you men because, no offense, but you are all pieces of ^*^&*%^# and $#%@^ which $#%# of %$#%&
*No offense taken. What happened to lead you to this conclusion?
– My Bresser. Can you magine? He is cheating on me?
*I thought you knew he was married.
-He has two wives, Sharifa and Amina. I don’t care about them bulky nineteen seventy-two model Datsun-looking chickenheads. I mean he has another side dish! Can you magine? Men! He was bressing anada heffa bayind my back! And she have a better phone than me!
*what? I can’t believe this. Men!
-he is telling me mbu honey she means nothing to me. Yet she got a full gb of ram. And 8megapixel camera. I gave that bald jackal the best two weeks of my past two weeks. And all I get is 512mb and 2megapixels? Who photographs this hotness of mine with 2mega… mbaff!!!
-I deserve at least a wawi way. You know it?
*If you mean Huawei Y6, yeah. They are selling them at Airtel shops even now. Get one of those. Then you can post your selfies bulungi. And we will like them as much as usual. Especially if you go back to shaving off the tuft between your eyebrows.
-You tell him to get one, not me. Me, do I look like I buy my own phones.
*Until you shave the thing between the eyebrows, you kinda do…
Next Up: Anita Apple Iphone 7