18 Million Dollar Dress: Oscar is On Drugs

Who is Cate Blanchett?


Ai ronno. The movies she acts in don’t have superheroes or kung fu and are not animated so I am not aware of any of them. She might as well be one of the Ebonies.

But we are told that she wore a newsworthy dress to the Oscars (A place where they clap for movies without superheroes and kung fu. No fucks given)

 Since no one in AP will give me permission to use the actual picture, here is one of Cat Blanket. If you click it you will go to Huffpo. They have the photo

Because it apparently cost $18 million. Dollars United States bucks #cashmoneyactors

Now, as economists around the world are asking themselves what the fuck. How. How. Of where.

So I investigated and here we go.


  • CGI= $1,500,000
  • Cocaine for Oscar De La Renta = $ 1,200,000
  • Raw Materials (platinum fibres and lion eyelashes) = $ 7,400,000
  • Bulletproof shields, flight-capable, radar fitted with state-of-the-art embedded missile defence systems by Stark Industries = $ 12,000,000
  • Fiber opticsand microchips wired into dress to make it an experimental 5G beacon  to provide WiFi for the whole Oscar auditorium. Provided by Apple technology so price marked up by x100  = $4,900,000
  • Printing misplaced ballots and delayed arrival of electoral materials = $ 3,800,000
  • VAT = 18 %
  • Blanchett’s wearing fee = $ 34,000,000
  • Slave labour = $ 4
  • Drones to intercept any incoming bird droppings = $570,000 each
  • Drones to find shitting birds and destroy them for their impudence = $670,000